Monday Morsels: Chocolate Coated

CHOCOLATE COATED

by K. Williams

Two lines. 

Well, that confirms it. With a deep sigh, I place the last test neatly beside the other four on the edge of the tub. Five is the magic number because if three of them came up negative, I could live in denial until my doctor’s appointment next week. 

“What do they say?” my friend Kari asks anxiously from the other side of the door.  

Sighing heavily, I throw open the door and let her inside. Her gaze flicks to mine and she frowns before hurrying over to the tub. A smile lights up her face when she turns around. “They’re all positive! You’re going to have a baby.”  

“Whoopie. A baby.” Blandness drips from my voice as I roll my eyes and twirl my finger in the air. Crossing my arms over my waist, I plop down on the closed toilet seat.  I knew when I couldn’t stand the smell of chocolate anymore something was wrong. Figures, I was right. Worry and elation swirls around in my chest. I’m ecstatic to be a mom but worry what the future will bring. Will this aversion to chocolate be permanent or is it just a temporary thing? I have no husband and no love life whatsoever, so how will my pregnancy affect those areas of my life. Stupid, I know, but those are the two things I’m worried most about right now.   

Kari reaches for the tests, but instead she changes her mind and pulls her hand back halfway there. “I would throw those away for you, but, you know,” her nose scrunches up, “you peed on them.”  

As usual, Kari makes me laugh. That’s why I keep her around. “No worries. I’ll take great joy in chucking them into the dumpster.”

“So… are you going to tell him?” She raises an eyebrow at me.  

I shake my head, frowning. “No.” Picking up the grocery bag I brought home the tests in, I lift each one, chucking them in the bag.  

Hands on her hips, she stares at me. “Why? You know he’ll man up for you.” 

“That’s the problem,” I protest. “I don’t want him to ‘man up’ because I’m pregnant.” My fingers draw quotation marks. 

“You have been in love with him since junior high school. Why don’t you just tell him? He’s your best friend and everything. I mean, I wish I had a best friend like that, but no…”

“Exactly. I’m his best friend.” I sigh, remembering the night that changed everything. “He doesn’t even remember that night, Kari. I’ve thrown all kind of hints his way, only to be met with a blank stare. If he doesn’t remember, who am I to tell him?” Tying the bag together, I leave my bathroom. I head for the front door, my heart sinking. “Nothing’s happened by now, so he must not see me as more than best friend material.” Even as I say it, I know I’m right. I’ll never be his, and he’ll never see me as anything more. It hurts to even think it. I brush a tear from my eye before Kari can see it. 

Kari follows me. “So you don’t think the father of your baby deserves to know?” 

“He does, but not right now.” I stop abruptly, and Kari runs into my back. I spin around on my heel. “Look, Kari, I want him to be with me because he wants me, not out of some obligation.” My breath shudders as I shrug. “But he just doesn’t feel that way about me.” Swallowing, I manage to push down the lump in my throat.  

“How do you know? Have you given him a chance?” Her eyes plead with mine before I turn away to continue my trek to the dumpster. “Remember when he found out you lost your virginity to Jess Baker? He didn’t speak to you for almost two weeks. You know he’s got to feel something for you.”  

“Elliot was just mad because Jess was a player who got into girls pants and then ignored them.” I toss the bag into the dumpster and turn back around heading for the building.  

Kari laughs. “I think he started speaking to you again, because the week after, Jess was walking around telling everyone he was going to marry you. Elliot couldn’t wait to talk to you after hearing him say it.”  

The ends of my lips tilt slightly, “He didn’t want to be replaced as my best friend.”  

We make it back up to our condo and close the door behind us. “But Seriously, Sutton. You really need to tell him.”  

“Elliot will know I’m pregnant,” I tell her, “he just won’t know it’s his and you won’t tell him. Right?” I give Kari a pointed look. Embarrassment prickles my body at the thought of telling him he’s fathered a baby stemming from a night he doesn’t remember. On top of everything else, I snuck out of bed before he woke up. No, Elliot really didn’t need to know that part, either. 

“Not my story to tell,” Kari said, “but you own a Chocolate Ice Cream Shop together, and he’s your best friend, so you better figure something out quick. Especially since you haven’t been able to stand the smell of chocolate for the past couple of weeks.” Kari raises an eyebrow at me. “You can’t work because of it and anything dairy sets you off. So, there goes your chocolate ice cream dreams.”

###

Pregnant.

By my best friend. 

Of course he doesn't remember our night together. No matter how much I hint at it. Sneaking out to avoid the uncomfortable talk that would come after and potentially mess up our friendship was the biggest mistake I ever made. 

What do I do now?

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